Oh great, another baby. Just what the world needed. If you’re here looking for a baby shower greeting card, at least make it one that tells the truth. None of that “blessing from above” bullshit. This is a tiny human-shaped chaos machine who’s about to destroy two people’s sanity, bank account, and sex life. So yeah, congrats.
Our funny baby shower cards say what everyone’s thinking but too polite to admit. “Hope you like never being alone again.” “Your boobs are now government property.” “One down, 17 years to go.” No pastel teddies or “bundle of joy” nonsense—just rude, sarcastic, and brutally honest baby shower cards for people who understand that life as they know it is officially over.
Whether they’re first-time parents, already exhausted with baby number three, or just realizing how much a kid actually costs, at least they’ll get one last laugh before drowning in nappies, vomit, and sleep deprivation. So pick a card, sign your name, and go back to living your free, responsibility-free life.
